Dear Lindsay, you didn’t know, you didn’t know what kind of man he was to me. He was the man that would never hurt me. The man who I trusted with my whole self. It was not your fault he went to you…we weren’t even really together at that point, so cheating is not the word… He lied to me, you didn’t even exist in my mind for the longest time. When he told me of you I was so utterly crushed, the one man I thought would never hurt me had lied to me over and over… had dated you for a month while I was ‘away’.
We talked everyday you know? While he was seeing you, he told me he was waiting, waiting for me to get better, to get home. I didn’t have a clue he was seeing you. The day I found out that you had ‘been’ I saw him differently. He was not the man I thought he was. Not the man I came home for. I still love him, but he is no longer the man who will never hurt me. Because of you I can’t look at him the same way. I don’t even know you, or what you look like. All I have is a name and all these pictures in my head.. did he fall in love? Did you fall in love? Why didn’t he just tell me about you?
He was mine, the strong protective man that loved me so much that he would put his on life in danger to save mine, and that was proven, after all, that’s why I had to go away. He was mine, and you took him, leaving me with a broken hurtful man that will never be the same.
Thanks for that… T.
Mother,
The last time I saw you, when I was 15, half a decade ago, you told me you had done your best. And I believed you.
Your best wasn’t good enough.
You said you loved me. And I don’t believe you. If that is what love is, I don’t want anything to do with it.
You didn’t love me enough to protect me from him. You didn’t love me enough to believe me.
I’m not afraid of you or of him anymore, and I feel confident that neither of you will ever be able to find me.
You have hurt me, but you no longer have any impact on my life. Nothing that you did, nothing that he did, none of it has scarred or damaged me. I won’t let it. You have no power over me.
I’m a strong, brave, compassionate person. And you have nothing to do with that. And it’s sad that you won’t get to be a part of my life. It’s sad that you’re too afraid to do what I did and just leave, run away, start over.
I forgive you. May you find peace and happiness.
What is the point of writing a unsent letter? To write a letter to someone without the intention of sending it gives you the ability to completely open up, to let your emotions run free. You will not have to worry about holding back anything out of fear of the other persons feelings, or even out of your own embarrassment about what you feel. So even if you are overy angry about something that you know in your head you shouldn’t be upset about, you need to get those feelings out, being able to submit a letter anonymously allows you to do that.
Take the popular site “Post Secret” for example, people send in random post cards about confessions, secret loves, hates, etc. Sharing that information can make you feel less alone, and possibly even help someone in your situation. Many feelings that we have, whether it is anger or guilt or even love for someone we can’t (or shouldn’t) have, are not ours alone. You may be thinking that you are crazy, that no one else could possibly feel the way you do about a situation, but you would be suprised at just how many others secretly share the same feelings.
Your letter does not have to be heart warming and sweet, it can be full of anger, sadness, or even rage. That is the joy of writing under a pen name, no judgment, no regret. I hope you enjoy reading the letters, and I can’t wait to read yours!
To Mr. Lawrence, I worked with your fat stinky self for three years. Doing everything you asked me to do, getting criticized day after day when you were pissed off at your wife. I did jobs that were below me, jobs that had nothing to do with hat I was hired for… doughnuts anyone? Then after three freaking years you decide to tell me that because of the ‘economy’ it just isn’t working? Then tried to make me feel two foot tall by telling me all the things I did wrong!
I happen to know that your stupid little business is doing just fine, not anymore of course since I rearranged all the files, good luck finding someone in this middle school drop out town to figure out that mess! Maybe it was wrong, but even more wrong was you trying desperately to cheat on your wife, only you were too fat to ever find a little mistress. Why she is even with you is beyond me, maybe it’s the money- but soon you wont have much of that, I fu$%ed up your filing system enough to make it impossible to contact the right customers and order the right materials.
The next time you decide to fire someone because even they wont go down on you you should think about this, the hell you are going through right now trying to figure out where everything went- oh yeah, and the call you will be getting today from the lawyer about the sexual harassment and subsequent firing… have fun explaining that one to your wife! You won’t actually have to explain anything, remember the security cameras you put in the shop last year- yeah- those are still working, and the tapes are among the missing crap in the office, three copies- one to my lawyer, one to your wife, and another for backup… again, F*%K off, lets see you get around this one!
Shove it,
T.S.
Dearest Matt, the memories I have of you are so varied. There are the ones of riding with you and talking for hours, then there are the ones of the fights. We never really argued out loud, both being so damn passive aggressive. I think that’s what made them so bad, finding each others deepest darkest button and pressing it…. Not just little things about hairstyles, no we had to go deeper, past mistakes we would bring up just to hurt the other… you would think we hated one another.
So why did we stay together? For the sex? That was great, but it wasn’t everything. I think it was out of convenience, our schedules matched, we lived nearby, we had the same hobbies, neither was broke or dependent on the other. It was a mistake to stay with you, some of the things you said to me back then still affect me to this day, it’s ridiculous really that I allow it! You were a complete ass, not in the abusive sort of way, and I can’t say that I wasn’t as much of an ass as you were, that’s for sure. I knew better then, and I know better now… it still hurts.
If only I could find you now, see a picture, a little about your life- god how I hope you have gained lot’s of weight… I need closure, I am tired of seeing your eyes, those beautiful eyes, in my dreams. All these years later when I see a man with pretty eyes I think of you…. I hate your eyes…
Wishing I Could Forget You… L.
S, We have been friends for 11 years now. Since the moment we became friends I felt like I have been chasing you down. I tried so hard to get you to include me. When you failed to invite me to go out with your friends I forgave you and jumped at the first invitation I got.
You have always been flaky, kinda airheaded. I attributed your failure to call me on your personality and the fact that you were a year older than me. You were so genuinely nice at times and so sorry for your actions I continued to forgive you.
Then you got to college. My senior year was lonely cause as soon as you were on your own I was out of your life. Of course I forgave you, because you were busy with college – who was I to demand your time?
You partied, had boyfriends and always had friends you went out with. I tried to get busy with my own life. You kept coming back in my life for whatever reason. When you suspected your boyfriend of cheating you wanted me to help you spy on him. When you had someone to talk bad about you needed me to listen. I always ran when you called, desperate to make you my best friend. I liked you, I saw a fun girl that understood my life. You listened to my crap too. You helped me get through tough friendships. That is, when you were there. That is when you freaking answered your phone.
We’d go through months and months where you would not answer your phone. Not even after I left voicemail after voicemail. And this was when I was hormonal and pregnant. I thought you’d understand since I was there for you and your mood swings.
Nope. (more…)
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