oh wait, you already did that to me. After 13 years of friendship and you just drop me. I wanted to – no I deserved to – be the one to drop you! I need to let you go, the friendship is over, isn’t that what matters?
NO!
I need closure. For some weird reason I want to tell you everything that has been sitting inside me all these years. I want to tell you how hurt it made me every time you would ignore me for months and then all of a sudden act like nothing was wrong. Why did I love you so much? Was it because deep inside I wanted a friend so badly that I was willing to put up with you?
I want to tell you this to your face!
But you have unfriended me on facebook, won’t return my calls or emails. What gives you the right to drop me? Why did you get the pleasure of dragging me along on a 13 year friendship and then you say when to rip the chord?
I feel so used, so cheated. I don’t even get the pleasure of telling you off.
Perhaps that is wise. I should have let you go when you graduated high school. It is hard to do that when we live in the same small town the entire 13 years though. My friends know you and running into you is so possible.
You were my maid of honor!
I was at your son’s birth!
I was there for you when your baby’s daddy cheated on you!
I helped you with your business by introducing you to my friends.
And the entire time you kept acting like you were there for me too. But you started to show your true colors. You started to answer less and less phone calls.
I just want to know what you think I did wrong – cause you are insane! I have been nothing but a good friend to you! I am not writing this letter because I want you back as a friend – you suck at that job – but I want closure. I want vindication. I want to say goodbye. I don’t want you to be the one to drop me because I don’t deserve that!
But at least I got it all out and I can move on.
Signed,
Too Good a Friend For You.
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19 Responses to “Goodbye my toxic friend,”
Feb 4th, 2010 at 5:38 pm
Oh, this is so sad! I can just feel the pain in her voice.
Feb 4th, 2010 at 6:52 pm
It’s hard. But when you feel that release finally – it gets better.
Feb 4th, 2010 at 7:42 pm
Saying goodbye is hard but your life will be so much better in the long run. Cherish and grow those relationships that are good for you.
Feb 4th, 2010 at 8:00 pm
unfriended on facebook? LOL. What a douche.
trisha
Feb 4th, 2010 at 8:00 pm
that just sucks saying goodbye is hard
Feb 4th, 2010 at 8:01 pm
This person is a selfish coward so do not be bothered by them. You are better than them. No matter how badly it hurts.
Lee
Feb 4th, 2010 at 8:01 pm
It’s so hard when a friendship that you’ve invested so much into fails
I’m sorry. I hope you get closure.
Feb 4th, 2010 at 8:01 pm
Yes, has happened to me too with a few people. Life goes on. Sorry for your pain.
Feb 4th, 2010 at 8:01 pm
I feel ya… I’ve been there. Boy have I been there.
Feb 4th, 2010 at 8:02 pm
some friends are fair weather & not real…
so sorry
Feb 4th, 2010 at 8:02 pm
Oh gosh. I’m glad you got this off your chest. No one needs a friend like that.
Feb 4th, 2010 at 8:02 pm
Either way…it’s good to be parted, from trouble. Nice to get it out though.
Feb 4th, 2010 at 8:02 pm
I’ve had to say goodbye to some toxic friends. It hurts and I’ll always care about them-but I just can’t have those types of people around….you’ll be better off.
Feb 4th, 2010 at 8:03 pm
Hugs sweetie! yes you r too good for that person glad u know it
Feb 4th, 2010 at 8:06 pm
I am going through this same exact thing, Im so sorry. We got into a huge family fight. I had been friends with my sister in law for 6 years. We spoke every week. I thought she was a true friend and ended up finding out that she was the one stirring the pot. Running in between my husbands sister and I. She stopped talking to me. Just droppd me like that. The whole family is confused because they all know what was really going on. It has taken me a long time to get over being hurt and now I am just mad. Our friendship was never real and I think that is what makes this so hard. I feel like an idiot sometimes. My husbands dad would ask me all the time why I liked her so much over the years because he knew what was going on. I think he was hinting bt I never got it. Anyway so sorry.
Lucy
Feb 10th, 2010 at 7:56 pm
Ugh, I lost my best friend last year after finding out she was having an affair with my husband (Jerry Springer!?) the horrible part is I still mourn her friendship. We were as close as two friends can be, and the betrayal is still as fresh in my mind as if it was yesterday. Just awful. And too, having no closure is awful because I was never able to even talk to her about it the way it all went down. I think losing our girlfriends is the worst, and then betrayal on top of it… ugh. She is right about “Too Good Of a Friend For You!”
Feb 10th, 2010 at 7:58 pm
I have a friend who did that to me while I was pregnant. She hung up on me because I asked her NOT to say things about the name I had chosen for my daughter. I tried calling back a few times and she would hang up on me every time.
20 years of friendship and she ended it just like that. It still hurts.
I have another friend that chose drugs and her skanky ho druggie friends over me. She even had one of them call me to tell me she didn’t want to be friends anymore. Didn’t even have the guts to tell me herself.
Why does it hurt us so much when they do this to us? Instinctively we know that we deserve better and it isn’t our faults, but still. WTF?
Feb 25th, 2010 at 7:18 pm
Oh, I really understand this one and need to do one of these of my own.
Mar 5th, 2010 at 7:38 am
I wanted say as I was reading this, I thought did someone crawl in my head a write this. I’m feeling the same way too and the only difference is it’s been 14 years. I love my friend like a sister and she was even there when my father passed away and it just seems like we are on different paths now. I fine with letting her go because i have prayed about it and realize i’m not losing anything, she is. Everything in this letter says everything that i feel. Good Luck Too Good a Friend for you!! Some people are only here for a season and our season is up.