I know I can’t feel the same way about anyone else for a long time. For a year, maybe two. I dread looking and seeing that you have a new girl, because I was yours, and you were mine. We loved each other, to the highest extent. Four years of an amazing relationship to prove that, you made me so happy just by talking to me, and I was the most special girl in the room when we were together.
But then, after two weeks of not seeing you cause you were on vacation, you come over and tell me you think we need to break up. I was stunned, shocked, and so, so hurt. My heart instantly broke, and I can’t understand how one day you love someone, and the next you just don’t. You told me the reason I just met your whole extended family, and we celebrated our 4 year anniversary was a way of you trying to ‘fix’ things in your head. But I guess you don’t feel anything for me now, or for the last month. The whole last month of ‘i love you’s’ have been lies, the kisses meant nothing, but you were still making me happy and making me smile.
I know I sound selfish, but I still love you. I think I always will. How can I just forget about my best friend? You were with me through my parent’s divorce, my troubles in school, my sadness, my anger…you were the only one I could share that with. We grew up together and learned what it meant to be in love with someone. We talked about forever.
And what kills me the most is that fact that I go to sleep in tears, and wake up three hours later the same way…and it seems like it’s not affecting you at all.
I’m holding on, and I’ll wait for you. I can’t give up and forget us.
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