
Times are so hard now that you’re gone. I have no one to cry to who will listen and care. Everyday I think about you guys. I hate it so much that you were taken from me. I have no one. I have no one to look to for guidance, I have no one to tell me that its going to be ok. Why did you leave us so soon. You didn’t tell us goodbye you just left us. I know you cant come back. But if you can see this if you can feel my thoughts please remember me. Because I will never forget you.
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- Dear friend,

I went to your grave for the first time this summer. I put my graduation picture on it. I had planned on keeping my shit together until I saw “loving father” written on it. Loving father? How were you ever even my father if you died when I was two? I wanted to beat the headstone into tiny pieces with my fists when i read that. I could have set the whole damn cemetery on fire. Loving fathers do not abandon their daughters or their wives.
Loving fathers do not hang themselves from basement rafters in the middle of the afternoon. I wonder if you’re in heaven. Do you know I’m writing this right now? Did you see the beautiful parts of my life? Graduating from high school, or falling in love or turning eighteen? How about when my life spiraled out of control. Did you see that? Did you see me do all those drugs or blow off college or sleep with all those nice guys from the bar? Read the rest of this entry »
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