Dear angel eyes,
It is amazing and strange how we ended up together. I am very happy. I have fears that I will be taken for granted again, but I am glad that we can be honest with each other about everything and accept each others faults. It is nice to be with someone not phony. I hope that we learn what we need to from each other but I’ve learned not to count on things lasting. I simply hope. I hope that you learn to see yourself the way that I see you as well and treat yourself right, as well as me. I hope you would really walk through fire for me though I’d never ask that. Also, the sex is the best ever in my life.
Love,
your skittish love
You win. You got exactly what you wanted. I hope the two of you are very happy together. I lost my best friend and the love of my life because of you. I hope you really, really appreciate him, especially since he is still bowing to your every whim two years after YOU broke up with him.
Why do you have to be so gorgeous? It’s making it really hard to get over you. I miss you.
I am writing here because I don’t want to stoop to the petty level of venting in Facebook where you can read it…. like you did last week. I am sorry that I had the audacity to sigh when you asked if I could prepare the baked potatoes for dinner. I tried to rectify the situation by saying that I would be happy to do it, but I really did have to run to the restroom first. Thanks for making sure to prep them quick enough to get it done before I returned. Thanks for the silent treatment. Thanks for taking a sigh personally. It feels really good when you try to punish me like a 5th grader. Strangely, I won’t be terribly sorry to see you leave in a couple months.
You decided after 30 days you couldn’t handle being a single mother. We supported you in that decision and took your two boys home with us. After going back and forth for a week over whether or not you were going to let us raise them, talking on the phone with you several times you agreed.We took them after they had been in the hospital for over a week because you couldn’t take care of them. They both came home with us on medication because they were sick. They had diaper rashes that had eaten the skin off their behinds because you didn’t change them often enough.
We watched those two little boys grow and blossom for 2 weeks. Then you hit us that you wanted them back. I waited in my mother’s office for 12 hours while we waited to hear where we would be dropping the boys off too. Yet again you changed your mind. Again we took the boys home and raised them for another 2 weeks. On day 29 you called again. This time for good. This time you weren’t going to change your mind.
I refused to go home from work. My mom and dad had to force me to leave. I rode in their car for the hour drive in tears. We arrived home just before the social workers came. I fed each boy one last time and gave them hugs and kisses. You see after 29 days these boys were our lives. My husband had taken off from work all 29 days to be home with them. We took them to the pediatrician’s. We took the one to a cardiologist because of his heart murmur. We did this out of pocket because the boys weren’t covered under our insurance at that point. But the money isn’t the issue. The emotional hell you put us through was horrible.
The social workers who were supposed to be working for both of us were no better. That first day you said you were going to take them back I talked to the social worker. We explained that we were thinking of putting the boys in foster care. They made me feel horrible for even considering it. Then the day you finally decided you wanted the boys back I went through an additional hell dealing with the social workers. As I stood in my kitchen silently crying and fixing bottles for them to take with the boys, the social worker asked me how I felt. Really bitch I raised these boys for 29 days and you want to know how I feel that they are being taken away from me? Gee let me guess. But because these social workers would have control over whether or not we would be able to adopt again I had to say nothing more than I’m numb. To make matters worse, these social workers that you put your children’s lives in their control, didn’t know how to install a car seat. Not only did I have to say good bye to my boys that day, not only did I have to make bottles and pack their little things, I had to actually install their car seats so they could be taken away.
I hope you find a family that fit your criteria more and that the boys are with them. You see I will never forget the fact that you told me on the phone that your only problem with us was that we were not the same race as the boys. It honestly had no effect on us but you couldn’t get over it.
Your boys left that day to never return to our lives. But I can guarantee not a day goes by that I don’t think of them, wonder how they are, imagine what they would be like.
We were good together in high school. You helped me through a really dark time in my life. There was a time I honestly thought we’d always be together. Then you had this cycle of hurting me by getting the attention of other girls. I wasn’t impressed. I was hurt. When you found out I wasn’t coming home from college one summer, you claimed devastation. You wanted to come get me and bring me home. Why? We had a fighting and making up cycle that I was beyond. I could be your friend, but nothing more. Then when you found out I was engaged, you wanted to “rescue” me. No one thought I was old enough to get married at 20. Guess what? It’s 10 years later, and we’re still happy. I also don’t want to be your friend on Facebook. Sadly because of your past attitude, your a potentially toxic friend now. I don’t have time for toxicity. Farewell.
